I Am Wonder Woman

Oh how I wish it were true. Wonder Woman (as played by Linda Carter) was, in a word, ‘freakin’ awesome. Great hair. Got the job done. Didn’t break a sweat & looked good doing it. I was her for Halloween one year…when I was 4. I looked good. My mom made me this blue cape, little red skirt and a sash that had a big star on it that I would tie around my waist. Heck, I think she even made me a headband, too. (It’s been such a long time ago; I’ve a hard time remembering.)

At any rate, I not only dressed up as Wonder Woman for Halloween but kept the costume in my closet and would pull it out any time I was feeling Wonder Woman-ish…which happened a lot. Unfortunately putting the costume on tended to bring out my 4 year old alter ego…and it is to that end that I will forever associate my costume with either sitting in time out or getting a swat. My mom finally took Wonder Woman away.

I had my annual MRIs done this year. I get them done every year, and every year I hear back from my doctors office with, “Yes, you have MS. Take your meds. We’ll see you next year.” Not this year. This year they found new scarring and I have to go back in. ***groan***

Sometimes I wish I could go back to being 4 and pretend to be Wonder Woman again.

It’s been 11 years since I was diagnosed. Eleven years of shots, MRIs, doctors visits, etc. and this is the first time in those 11 years that there is any new activity. I’m very grateful that MS has not gained ground in my brain over these last 11 years. But, I’m scared. As it turns out, I’m not Wonder Woman. Not even close. I’m just me…and that ‘me’ has got some probs.

I wish there was some really deep spiritual thing I could say on this topic, but …nothing comes to mind. Just that, I know I’m in good hands. I know who keeps me. I know that the little girl who dressed up as Wonder Woman a long time ago is, in reality, a daughter of a King. For that reason alone the burden is lighter and I can taste grace in this moment.

“I’ve been carrying you on my back from the day you were born, And I’ll keep on carrying you when you’re old. I’ll be there, bearing you when you’re old and gray. I’ve done it and will keep on doing it, carrying you on my back, saving you.” Isaiah 46:4 (MSG)

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